Six months ago as I prepared to subject myself to another ( in a long line of the bizarre) internet date, courtesy of Yahooooooooooooo, I began to reminisce about the old days. You know the “back in the day” memories a long playing and never ending reminder of what was and will never be ? It was the “Old School” hour, circa 1970’s, brought on by the fact that my ensuing date was with a woman 17 years south of my age. This girl, who claimed to have posed for Playboy, was so far in the rear view mirror of life, I began to wonder if I should “card” her just to be safe. . . I mean for god sake she was in her late 20s and I was tippin the scales at a robust 40 something!
Then it hit me: what the “*$#@” was I going to talk about with her ? This thought triggered my memories. . . with the soundtrack of my life provided by Tower of Power slammin in the background.
*Gratuitous Disclaimer: Mom if you are reading this-now is the time to cover your eyes! If you are not at least 40yrs old don’t bother to read this–you would never understand because you never lived it!
“Back in the Day” guys had girl length hair but no piercings. Tatooes and goatees were signs of a true outlaw and to be worn only by your friendly neighborhood Hell’s Angel, sailor on shore leave, or anyone incarcerated.
Girls did not have tatooes unless they wished to be considered from another planet, they had “wings”, wore butterfingers and candies, and girls never considered professional boxing a career move.
Men’s fashions were in a word tight and I don’t mean cool. Tight pants suction cupped onto your gluteus, airplane strength materials spray painted onto your torso with multi color outdoor landscape scenes unbuttoned down to your zipper, and platform shoes that made even Chili Eye Charlie a tall man. Yup you were truckin down the road lickin in life. . . and what a different life it was back in the day.
No internet, no answering machines or voicemail, no microwave ovens, no cell phones, no vcr or dvd players, no cable tv, no home video games, no remote controls (I was my father’s human remote placed strategically next to the tube to turn the channel when commanded), and no cordless phones were just a few of the technological differences.
Then there was the subject of sex and drugs (bye bye mom). There was NO AIDS epidemic. I repeat there was NO disease which could take your life and the life of your beloved friends. The worse case scenario was something painful, something unpleasant, and a gift that kept on giving without taking your life. . . What am I trying to say here? Yup people were doin it and doin it as often as possible “back in the day. . .”
And that drug thing. . . well on any given day you could be riding down 101 South heading into the city glance to the right of you and a VW bug would be engulfed in what looked like a car fire. No sight of passengers, just a white smoke filled cabin that would have made Spicoli proud! Turn to view the other lane and you might catch a glimpse of a group of people sardine’d into a muscle car passing a bottle of J.D. and a doobie in rotation at 70 mph. MADD were not yet in existence and neither were intelligent choices but that was what it was like “back in the day.”
That date 6 months ago went as I knew it would. . . it limped through dinner like a dog lost in the desert on it’s last leg, wobbled afterward like your oh so embarrassing drunk uncle, and it finally died a whimpering death after a grand total of 1 hour and 12 minutes of pure torture. Thank God!
Today I have a beautiful and age appropriate (for me) girlfriend Susan rescuing me from that torturous existence. I love today’s internet and all technological breakthroughs. My clothes are looser, my hair thinner, my muscles bigger, and my attitude very grateful. Spirituality in place of materialism is a wonderful place to be. . .
What was it like “back in the day” for you?